Mairead Hennessy

(The old Greystones harbour)

I noticed a sign out on the motorway yesterday saying that Mount User gardens were open again after the winter. That is definitely a sign of spring. So, I’m going to take my camera there and bring back some colour. I have been taking nature for granted most of the winter.

(The old harbour from a distance)

One day last week I noticed a crow looking a little unbalanced because he was carrying a very long branch in his beak. As birds go, I find crows very dull. They can fly but other than that…. And they make a horrible cawing noise and they lack colourful feathers. Seeing the crow with the long branch was the fist time I thought of crows as cute. They’re birds too, just bigger. That particular crow was collecting branches for his nest, big nest.

(The old harbour from very far away!)

So that got me thinking… what else am I missing/ignoring/taking for granted? And what am I judging by the colour of its feathers? The things we miss or ignore or take for granted can be related to our normal thinking. The same is true of our judgements. What we judge as wrong or bad or even good might just be something we grew up believing was wrong or bad or good.

What’s wrong? Mairead.

(The Sugar Loaf and the sea)

I went for a walk today. It was early, before the rush crowd so it was easy to hear the birds, the nice song birds. The sun was shining and I was feeling good. It brought back a really strong, beautiful memory of being with my Dad on a frosty sunny morning, out in the countryside by the edge of a big field. I was about ten. There were lots of other people around, mostly men, talking and joking and I was happy.

(Beautiful beach somewhere in Wexford)

We were at a coursing meet. For those of you who had a different childhood reality to mine, coursing is dog racing with real live wild hares. A hare is let out of a pen first and then two dogs run after it. The winning dog goes onto the next round and the overall winner gets a trophy. The hares either escape or die.

(Sand and stones on Greystones beach)

In my reality that behaviour was normal. We have all grown up with behaviours that are normal for us and our childhoods. We have also grown up with thinking that is normal for us…. Thinking like, life is hard, it’s impossible to get a job, I couldn’t succeed in that, there’s not enough time, you’re dreaming! It’s probably unlikely that my coursing memories will have a negative impact on the quality of my life, but my normal thinking might….

Think abnormal, Mairead.

(Calm seas)

I’m tired today and I’ve left writing this post too late for the amount of energy available. But instead of getting a little annoyed with myself I’ve decided to be kind to myself. Ok little self what can I do to help you? No answer but that really feels nice, soft and squishy. It’s the opposite of the way I usually feel when I get annoyed with myself.

(Dense undergrowth)

But just to experiment lets try the other way… Ok lazy, get that post done now, you’re always leaving things to the last minute, you’re lazy and you procrastinate! Ok that’s not so nice, it’s feels like a huge dollop of concrete poured into my torso and limbs – I really don’t feel like doing anything now.

(Raindrops and flowers)

Why do we think that being annoyed or angry with ourselves we’ll get things done. Why do we think that when we call ourselves stupid we’ll be able to behave smarter? Why do we treat ourselves harshly in order to get the best out of ourselves?  Is there another way?

Ok little self, rest, Mairead.