baby steps

Bletchley Park… it’s a secret.

| Mairead

22 7b

(The big house)

We’re in Bletchley Park (near Milton Keynes) the home of World War II code breakers and the birthplace of digital computers. Ciara and I are sitting in Hut 4, having lunch and resting after a guided tour. Denis is on his second tour… of the Computing Museum section. Bletchley is a very interesting place. Way back in 1937 the big house and about 500 acres went up for sale when the owners died. The estate was divided into lots and a local builder bought fifty acres along with the big house –  he wanted to knock the house and put up a housing estate.

22 7g

(Hut 1.. with part of its protective wall)

The secret service at the time were watching Hitler and considered war a likely possibility. They needed to be in a position to do secret things and not be noticed and Bletchley Park offered the perfect solution. It was forty miles from London so protected by distance. It was close to a railway station. It was halfway between Oxford and Cambridge – where the smart puzzle solvers were to be found. And I can’t remember why but it was in the perfect location for telephone communication, and people who were smart communication device builders (telephone engineers.) A compulsory purchase order meant that there’s no housing estate and the big house still stands.

22 7c

(An Enigma machine)

So the secret stuff began… when the British found a German coding machine called the Enigma. Also, three Polish secret service officers, realising they would soon be invaded by Germany, gave information they had uncovered about a very similar coding machine to the British and French governments. With that information smart puzzle solver Alan Turing took four months to break the puzzle of the Enigma and uncover how it worked. But that was just the first step….. they had to build a machine (with more help from the Polish secret service) that would turn the coded messages into German language messages and then into English. This was in 1940 and for most of the rest of the war all messages sent from the German military were coded using the Enigma, thinking they were secret. It gave the British military a big advantage.

22 7f

(The lake with the big house in the background)

By the end of the war there were 8,000 people working at Bletchley Park. Everyone who worked here signed the official secrets act and had to keep the secret of Bletchley and they did. Stephen, our guide told a story of a recent woman visitor whose mother had worked in the Japanese message-breaking hut. The woman told him that she had only recently discovered that her mother worked for the secret service and spoke fluent Japanese. Today Bletchley is run by enthusiasts and volunteers who maintain the grounds, the house and the huts, they also run the tours and make the sandwiches.

Take the first step, it’ll give you a big advantage, Mairead.

Grow your own… dreams.

| Mairead

18 7f

(Ripening tomato)

There were a lot of things growing while I was in the Wilderness, tomatoes, courgettes, lettuce, weeds, to name a few. Each night as I watered the plants in the greenhouse I was able to notice their progress. At first I just noticed the one orange ripening tomato and little yellow flowers. Then I noticed a hidden green tomato. It was green so it blended in with the leaves. But then I started to notice the flowers as they turned from bright yellow into dull green… into tomatoes.

18 7a

(The yellow flowers turning as they become tomatoes)

Of course, I’ve done biology in school and I know that the bees and other insects pollinate the flowers and that’s how the fruit is created but seeing it happen in front of my eyes made me pause…. The same thing was happening outside with the courgettes. As the beautiful orange-yellow flower was dying it was being pushed forward by the growth of a little courgette plant. The courgette plants didn’t even have the benefit of the warmth of the greenhouse or the regularity of my watering (although the rain was pretty regular.) They just got on with the job with only nature to assist.

18 7b

(One of the flowers has turned into a tomato)

Each day as I wandered around outside, chatting with the hens or just experiencing the calm I noticed these growing things and I wondered what I was noticing. Was it the fading colours of young flowers turning into the nourishing strength of fruit and vegetable? Was it the power of nature that allowed the plants to do their thing? Was it the daily slow growth step by hidden step that resulted in bounty? Was it the cycle of planting a seed, feeding it, watering it, giving it light and heat, allowing it to produce?

18 7e

(The courgette… notice the little plant at the base of the flower)

Was it the intention of the grower, one day long ago who decided he really wanted to grow tomatoes and he took the first step and bought the seeds? When the grower returned to only one ripe tomato he told me that he had met a woman on his travels who had decided she wanted tomatoes. She took a lot less care than the grower and already within a very short time she was collecting and sharing lots of ripe tomatoes. She lived in a place with lots of sun. Growth is taking a little longer in Ireland this year… lucky us, we get time to enjoy every step of the cycle!

“….the best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago. The second best time is now…” African Proverb.

Plant your seed, Mairead.

Ode to the girls….

| Mairead

17 7a

(Contentment –  even with green hair)

I’m back home now and I’m hen-less and egg-less. Will go to the supermarket later for the eggs but we won’t be getting hens. Some people and animals come into your life for just a short time and then they leave. But not before passing on a message or a lesson. What I can remember best from the hens is their one step after the other approach to life…… Sure they were cautious, but once the danger (usually me) passed by or stopped and backed away, then they continued one step after the other.

17 7b

(Take the next step)

Another thing about the hens, they did their own foraging. Each day I presented them with a shovelful of feed and some “treats” but that wasn’t all they ate. They spent a lot of their time scratched around for tasty worms and insects. They could have so easily sat back and eaten the food provided but they took nourishment into their own hands, they maintained their independence and probably their good health.

17 7c

(Celebrate the mistake)

Although I let them out in the mornings (or in the afternoon if I wanted an egg) I didn’t put them back in their pen, they went back in themselves, in their own time. I locked the gate when I found them tucked up together in their house. And the eggs… whenever possible they left their eggs in a place of their choosing, where I never found them.

17 7e

(Find the beauty)

They remind me of Dr. Viktor Frankl who wrote Man’s Search for Meaning having survived life in a concentration camp. Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing: the last of human freedoms to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. Viktor E. Frankl.

He could easily have included hens, Mairead.

Walking in baby steps.

| Mairead

(Which path?)

I’m navigating my surroundings today by walking. There are lots of pathways through the forest and I’ve been walking along them. Sometimes I come to a side junction and although it’s tempting to take it I’ve been sticking to the main paths. It seems I need to get the basic pattern of the forest into my system before I branch out. The other thing I’ve been doing is looking down. The path surface is quite rutted and uneven so I’ve been taking care not to miss my footing. I’ve been taking baby steps.

(Grassy path)

That got me thinking….. about creating new behaviours – like taking up healthy eating or even healthy thinking or getting more exercise. When I start something new, I always expect to get it right first time or else I’m really annoyed with myself. I always expect to be as proficient at doing the new thing as I am about thinking about doing it. It might be more useful to take baby steps.

(Uneven path)

So, for example, a possible new behaviour like get more exercise. Before I start I would have to get specific. So, what is the desired new behaviour? I want to walk. How much do you want to walk? Well, I’ve heard that twenty-minute walks are a good start so I want to walk twenty minutes, twice a day. Okay then I begin. The first day always goes well, I’m highly motivated. By day three I’m increasing the time to forty minutes and possibly the frequency to twice as often…. By day twelve I have a list of excuses why I’m not good at exercise and I haven’t been out in days. This is the time for the baby steps.

 

(Path ahead?)

Baby steps are kind and gentle. When the baby toddler stumbles while teetering from chair to chair and falls flat on his face, do you say, You big slob! You’ve been doing this toddler thing for days and you’re still falling! No, but you say it to yourself. You big slob, you haven’t been out for a walk for days, you’ll never get healthy! Baby steps are different. Baby steps say, Ah sweetie, did you find it hard to keep up the walking? Up you get now, go out the door and start again. Baby steps encourage you to do what you can when you can, no more no less and without the mean attitude!

Be nice to yourself, Mairead.

Organic Gardening.

| Mairead

Fork

(Tip: Take in your garden tools at the end of the summer)

While I was out in the garden just now, I was thinking about organic change. You might remember the situation with the very tall and healthy weeds in the garden last year? Well… things have changed, the weeds are alive and well and they’ve been having children, so it’s even more densely packed down there. While the weather was cold I was able to ignore the debauchery but it was sunny yesterday. So I went and had a look – it’s bad. For a moment or two I was in despair. But a funny thing happened….

Pot

(Tip: Some pots are not frost-proof)

We went on our Saturday date to a coffee shop that also happens to have a garden centre. While we were wandering among the plants on our way to coffee the beginnings of an old love affair were stirring in my heart. No, I won’t be leaving Denis. It was my love affair with gardening. I had forgotten but the last time the garden was weed-free I had a great time planting and pruning. And before that I remember digging was great for anger! So I bought a bag of compost and a few herbs and when we got home I began gardening. Not the forced gardening where all the weeds must be pulled or dug and the grass must be cut and the hedges must be trimmed today. No, instead, the baby step organic gardening of pots and plants. One by one at my leisure I put the herbs and the compost into some pots. I enjoyed myself for three hours and then spent an hour admiring my work. (I positioned my chair carefully so that I couldn’t see the weeds.)

Veg

(Aren’t vegetables lovely?)

Like forced change, forced gardening is no fun… on the other hand organic gardening is lots of fun. I’m not talking about gardening without chemicals (which I also like..) I’m talking about gardening at your own pace, in your own time, you can even sit down while you do it! When I got up this morning I couldn’t wait to get outside and do some more organic gardening. I didn’t even stop when the rain came. The weeds won’t be cleared in a few days, it’ll probably take a few months, but that just means I’ll have months of fun!

Could this be the start of an organic way of life? Mairead.

Look! It’s the break light!

| Mairead

3

(Graffiti in cafe toilet – I didn’t write it)

I’ve uncovered another of my patterns and this one is big (for me). I’ve been working away for the past month on productivity. I’ve read the book, Getting Things Done by David Allen. I’ve had sessions with my friend Ashleigh. I’ve started using the PomodoroPro. I’ve devised a schedule with thirty minute time slots. My diary was full of next thing to do’s. I had three weeks of amazing productivity.

1

(Rowing on the Liffey in Dublin, with the Ha’penny Bridge in the background)

And then I crashed. I’ve been tired and motivation-less since last Thursday. I know this is a pattern… it was pointed out to me that I do this regularly. What do I do? I drive myself forward, paying no attention to the vehicle I am driving. I run out of fuel. The vehicle stops. For the duration of my life the vehicle is my body. I do feed my body and lately I feed it well, but I have not been paying attention. A light on the dashboard was flashing and I ignored it. It was the “break” light. When I pay no attention, I don’t know it’s time to rest. To take a break, a siestas, some free time, do some day dreaming, be at ease.

2

(Scary but true)

There are probably lots of reasons why this is my pattern. As with all patterns, it starts because it’s necessary and it works. There is a clue as to why it continues. It’s part of my normal thinking, something I didn’t realise….. I think taking a break is unfair, unless you work exceedingly hard and I experience extreme shame when I take a break unless I am exhausted. The good news is that it’s like my “I have to eat meat every day” belief – crazy but normal for me. And as we saw with the meat belief once you become aware of your normal thinking it’s possible to let it go.

I’ll be taking baby steps with this one, step, rest, step, sit down, up we get , step, Mairead.

Birds and Toddlers do it.

| Mairead

1

(A Robin)

The birds are singing outside the window again as I write and I continue to be amazed at how much their singing affects me. For the better. I’m cheered just listening to them do their thing. They have no idea I’m here enjoying them. They are definitely not doing it for me. In fact I don’t know why they sing. It makes me feel good to imagine that they sing because they enjoy singing.

3

(More birds)

They remind me of the daughter, when she was a toddler. She used to sing to herself as she played with her toys. The tune was never recognisable and the lyrics were a jumble of words and syllables. One day I told her I would write down the words so she could keep her song forever. She didn’t seem that interested but she let me write every word and syllable.

2

(Rory, a long, long time ago when he was a toddler)

To the little toddler forever is right now, this moment, because this moment never ends… now is always now. To the adult, now is just a passing blink as we head straight for tomorrow. The singing birds halt everything…… and bring my attention to now, here and now, exactly where I am… now.

Now, where are you? Mairead.

Ok we’re home now….

| Mairead

(Charlottenburg Palace)

Right, let’s get a few things straight. I will want you to remind me of these if I mention another holiday.

So pay close attention:

1. Irish-type weather suits me, even though I love sunshine…. it’s not my friend.

2. My delicate constitution is allergic to insect bites…… always bring bug spray….. and use it.

3. One museum a day is quite enough.

(Walk along the river Spree)

4. A rest in the afternoon is essential if I wish to go out “clubbing” (my word for going outside after dark).

5. Early morning starts help no one, all alarms should be set for a time after 10am.

6. Stick with the packing policy of just enough clothes, it’s working…… but maybe some more shampoo would be good.

7. Factor in some all alone time…. no comment.

8. Go for longer.

(Pink flamingos in the zoo)

Ok that’s it, my recipe for a happy holiday. I did have a great time, loved Berlin and the museums (I think we did five?) and the jazz clubs and the symphony orchestra and the zoo and the palace at Charlottenburg and the market and Unter den Linden and the cafes and the people and the history and the street theatre and loved, loved, loved the Segway! Possibly did a bit too much in five days though?

And so to sleep, Mairead.