Today was my rest day but it was very busy. Someone missed the bus so I got out of bed to drive him to college and on the way back I went to Avoca for a tea and scones breakfast, yum. Then it was time for Somatics (my movement class). After that I enjoyed some nice coffee and another scone, yum, yum. Then it was four o’clock (where did the day go?) and time for my Shiatsu (Japanese therapy). By the time I got there it was five o’clock. An hour and a half later it was time to collect the son and his keyboard and his amp from Dublin. Too late to make dinner we had burgers on the way home in Eddie Rockets.

I may need to rethink my food choices, otherwise, what a perfect day….. no cooking, Mairead.

(Table top view)

The son is cooking dinner so I can sit back and contemplate the sky while listening to the sounds and smelling the smells of lasagne. It seems like only yesterday that I was panicking because I thought I’d forgotten to put him and his car seat into the car, fifteen minutes after I’d driven away from the house! It’s not easy to simultaneously drive, panic and twist around from the front seat to lock eyes with a two week old baby, who is calmly staring back at you. It took me a few more weeks to realise he was just quiet, not missing.

(Leaving Dublin)

I mentioned previously we had a black kitten who comes to our back door for food. I don’t want another cat, but the daughter was tempted by his big eyes and so she started feeding him. Today he was at the door meowing loudly. No one told him his carer was going away. But he doesn’t seem too worried, now he looks at me when he meows. He’s a smart cat.

(Close-up of the comfy lounge logo on the comfy seat in the comfy lounge on the ship)

Sometimes we think…. ok, I think…. I’m responsible for other people and that every move I make in relation to them must be perfect or I’ll destroy them. Especially if they’re my children. But also, even if they’re my pets. This is not really useful thinking (in case you were wondering) and it’s also crazy thinking!

Even though I almost left my baby son at home alone, he’s survived. Even though there’s no one here to feed the stray kitten, he’s survived too.

No one got destroyed here today, Mairead.

PS Yes I did feed the kitten……. he has such big beautiful eyes….. I think he likes me…..

(Can you see that little opening on the side of the ship?)

I had a very exciting time today… having green tea in a local shopping centre. There I was minding my own business when I noticed a man in a suit looking at me. Well at least I thought he was looking at me. I started doing that thing you do, you know where you look away and then back again? Did that a few times before I realised he was a security guard.

(There’s a car going in there!)

And that got me thinking about the job of a security guard. It didn’t take me long, I don’t know anything about the job of a security guard. But surely they have to stay alert to everything around them? There might be other stuff happening while he’s looking my way. He was still looking.

Then another man in a suit joined him. And they were both looking in my direction and talking animatedly….. The second man began walking towards me. I was starting to feel a little uneasy. Did I pay for the tea? He stopped before he got to me though, in front of a woman who was adding milk to her takeaway coffee and asked her to…. please return to the shop with me.

(Yep, we’re going in the side door! Sorry about strange angle, fear can do that to a person)

Maybe he was her boss and she was late getting back after her break? Maybe he was her son and she had the credit card to pay for his new clothes? Maybe….

Things are not always as they seem, Mairead.

(Container Patchwork)

We’re sitting in the comfy lounge on the 2.30pm ferry going home from Wales. Never been in the comfy lounge before. It is very comfy. The seats recline. There’s free coffee, tea (including green!), gluten-free cake, biscuits, soft drinks, little dishes of olives (really!), bags of crisps and all the wine you can drink. There’s also a magazine and newspaper rack. And the whole ship has free wifi. Just like home really. Except there’s lots of people in here we don’t know…….

(Coffee, tea and gluten-free cake)

So… everything worked out well in the end. The daughter is settling into her new home, sticking posters on the walls  and connecting to the world (aka the internet!) As parents we each did our thing. Her dad found a great mobile phone package that included some international connectivity, some local connectivity and a lot of internet connectivity. Her mother (me) got enough food to fill the fridge (even though she only has one shelf…) and a sizable cupboard.

(Fishguard Harbour)

I suppose that’s what parents have to do….. whatever they can.

I think I’ll try the olives, Mairead.

(Nice calming sky, by Ashleigh)

As I write it’s Sunday morning. We’re off to Wales today, by ferry, at 2.30pm from Rosslare. Just now, less than thirty minutes until we leave the house, I logged onto the ferry company website to confirm the sailing times. Funny thing… our ferry wasn’t on the list. There’s no ferry leaving at 2.30pm! I looked again at our e-ticket. Oops….

Nooooo! I have booked us onto the 2.30pm ferry from Fishguard (in Wales) not the 2.30pm to Fishguard….

(Nice calm water, very small boats….)

There was a moment’s silence before the adrenaline rushed in. Then, my heart started pumping and I grabbed a phone, found a number and paced as I listened to the holding-music. When a human answered I told him everything….. Daughter leaving home, we’re bringing all her stuff, just dropping her off, I made a mistake, no ferry, what’ll we do, what can we do? are there any other ferries? can you help? He asked, …and you are in Ireland? I took a deep breath, checked and replied, yes, yes I am in Ireland. When he understood what I had done he asked me to wait while he put the phone down (no music, only the soothing sound of his fast tapping on a keyboard) and changed my booking. He was calm and kind and he fixed everything. And there was no charge. (Three cheers for ferries!)

(Nice calming flowers)

We will be on that 2.30pm ferry from Fishguard, tomorrow. We will be on the 4.00pm ferry from Dublin today. Right now, we’re still in Ireland. Sometimes it’s useful to check where we are, right now……. because our thinking often takes us to where we will be tomorrow.

Thank you nice man in the Stena Line office in Dublin, Mairead.

(At three, coming to grips with the technical details of a mirror)

Today a van passed us, as we were on our way to buy a duvet for Ciara (our daughter) to take to Wales next week (she’s going to college). The name on the side of the van was…. Green Energy. And on the back of the van they were carrying a bicycle….. you know, to save energy? pedal power? green? Isn’t it nice when someone shows us what can be done?

(On reflection…)

It’s easy to tell other people what they should do. It’s easy to understand why they should do it. It’s obvious…… but it’s not really that useful.

(At nine, exploring Mr. Napkin-Head)

Fortunately, there’s a flip side to this. It’s much more useful for us to see what we can do when we notice what others have done. When we hear of the courageous efforts of a friend who gets on with her life after a painful experience. Or the relative who has touched the hearts of his neighbours with his simple generosity.

(As seen on birthday card…) Take my advice, I’m not using it, Mairead.

(Well, that certainly sounds nice…..)

I’m planning on being more organised. I’ve written everything down. I’ve added start times and end times. My plan is to put the important things in first and fit the less important things (like dinner…) later. It was going so well last week. Every morning I went off to a coffee place, set myself up with a tea and something sweet (might need to rethink that?) and began to write.

(What?)

Then on Friday evening as I was organising everything to attend my weekend course I realised that I had not sent in my latest assignment. I forgot to add it as a big thing in the beginning and it kept falling off the list at the end of each day until I remembered it on Friday. Then it was important and urgent and scary.

(Maybe I need to get different books?)

So I may need to tweak a few things before my new system is perfect. Like what are the things that I think are important? Do I have too many important things? Do I have too many unimportant things? (Why am I doing unimportant things?) Is dinner really necessary? 

I’ll keep you posted (if it’s important… or becomes urgent), Mairead.

(This is pretty little Willow)

I made a great Chilli con Carne today with organic beef. A friend was coming to dinner and I was delighted with myself, everything turned out so well, until…..  I realised she didn’t eat red meat. So, I had the chilli and she had tomatoes and cheese!

(There were four red peppers in my chilli)

There was a moment before I put the meat into the vegetables, when everything was smelling and looking lovely, that I wondered if she was a vegetarian. In that moment I had a number of possibilities open to me…. 1) Put the meat in, of course she eats meat. 2) Don’t put the meat in, even if she eats meat. 3) Have one pot with meat and one without, so she can choose. 4) Ring and ask!

(… and she had cheese….)

There are always possibilities open to us, we don’t always see them. But sometimes we do and we ignore them.

Explore the possibilities, Mairead.

PS The September Success Team is beginning next week. A group of people are about to uncover what it is they really want. After that they’ll realise they have the support of everyone around the table to get it. Then they’ll take the first tiny, little step in the direction of the life they want to be living. Then they’ll find out that they can be grumpy or angry or fed up and still take that step. Then they’ll take that step. I’ve set up a new website called www.irishsuccessteams.com with the stories and the details. In eight weeks time there will be more stories. Some will be about people who, today, don’t even know what they want. Do you want to read all about it or do you want to be in it?

(Newly cut trees from near Liam and Kate’s house)

Since I lost my server and therefore my site recently, I’ve been temporarily using the tumblir system. It’s a blogging tool. But the interesting thing about it is that you get to see other people’s blogs. I never read other people’s blogs….. but with this tumblir other people’s blogs pop up in front of me daily.

(Big cat in Berlin Zoo)

Anyway, I was reading a blog that said some people are poisonous to our well-being. Perfectly nice people, but somehow we’re allergic to them. How do we know who we’re allergic to? Well, if you spend some time with someone and afterwards you feel lethargic or exhausted, its a clue there may be poison there. If on the other hand you feel energized after being with them, then no poison……

Stop taking the poison, people! Mairead.